I was sat at home yesterday, staring into space as Anne waited for me to tune back into the present. She knows me well enough now that these internal jaunts no longer merit comment. I'd like to say that I was working on a short story or one of the two novels I'm developing; but the truth is I was snagged on a memory.
I'm 23 and it's a hot, sticky August evening. It's my last day on Staten Island and the end of about a year spent living the American Dream. Well, surviving it anyway. My flatmate Lillian and I are downstairs, gazing out on the street and there's no one around. Out the corner of my eye I spot this pinpoint of light, roaming in the evening air towards me. It's a firefly. And as soon as I see it, this wave of sadness, of unrequited longing for the year-that-never-was, chokes my thoughts. I'm transfixed by this tiny glow and all at once a host of them appear and circle around us.
Lillian is non-plussed; they're just fireflies after all. But I swallow hard and realise that I'd never seen them before, not until this night - my last night. And at that moment, it becomes a metaphor and a distillation of the whole experience. In my quest for the wrong woman and a life that was never mine, I'd missed out on so many other things. Small things perhaps, but things of beauty and potency. Then we go back inside and watch some TV while I finish packing. The next morning I flew back to Britain - thinner, wiser and paler (if that's possible).
So yesterday, there I was and this 23 year-old self drifted over to me. He was a writer too, of course, and many of his primitive ideas have since made it to print. It wasn't a social visit though. I think he was trying to tell me that there's more to the writer's life than fixating on the next round of submissions and worrying about my income. For one thing, there's fireflies, if you know where to look.
Compensation: nil - writers' revolt
Some time ago I posted about the lamentable state of affairs, whereby writers are encouraged to work for nothing on the basis that this will give them experience and raise their profile. That profile presumably being of someone who doesn't think they have sufficient experience and who will therefore work for nothing.
See http://alongthewritelines.blogspot.com/2010/01/compensation-nil.html - the title has changed.
Since then, I've noticed a bit of a fight back or perhaps 'bite back' is more appropriate. On Craigslist, for example, there has been a flurry of reply postings to requests for scripts or for those oh so affordable article writers, focusing not only on price but also on common sense (even if the spelling needs a little work).
"Why would you send your scripts to someone you don't know without first signing a release?
Wanne be a pro? Act like one... and expect the same."
RE: Writer Needed -- Not even up to slave labor!
"This guy is offering to pay a whopping $3.50 per 300 word article. That's 1.1¢ per word! That's not even at the level of slave labor, which at least feeds you! Minimum wage -- uh uh, not even trying."
re: Writer Needed
"pay scale is identical" to whom, exactly? perhaps companies based out of a third-world country? because i write for several and NONE are that low. Compensation: 350 pennies in a jar. you must supply jar."
I have emailed some of these protestors and it's a familiar tale of frustration and disappointment. But I suspect that the root cause of their malcontent lies in the recognition that not every one who wants to write is cut out to be a writer. And that even those who persist have no guarantee of success or even subsistence from their craft.
As I stated before, there will always be a tide of newcomers willing to try their hand, certain they can rise above the pile to become a 'proper writer'. In a sense, every beginner starts off from a similar position. While there will always be success stories to inspire and motivate us, the cold truth is that we are, in part, at the mercy of mathematics every bit as unforgiving as those that operate in the world of nature. You can tip the scales in your favour by writing well, by being professional and by working diligently and tenaciously. But ultimately, it will always be a numbers game to some extent. If all of that still doesn't put you off, congratulations- you're probably a writer. And I can recommend a few freelance websites for you to avoid!
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