In search of a perfect formula or Cu2CO3(OH)2

Not quite Cu2CO3(OH)2, but wondrous, nonetheless.

We are drowning in a sea of information, except that we're not necessarily becoming any more informed. More opinionated, possibly, but that's not quite the same thing.

Wanna be a writer?

Sure you do, and now it's easy. You don't need to live, to challenge yourself, overcome difficulties and express your inner truth; no, you just need to follow the steps, connect the dots and, most importantly of all, trust in the formula. 

Because there's always a system, right? 

Erm...

Alongside opposable thumbs, superior intellect (superior emotional intelligence pending...) and an ability to make and use tools, surely one of our greatest gifts is the ability to make and recognise patterns. We are adept at observing and recording, and then making deductions to allow us to make sense of whatever we're presented with.

When it comes to writing, which - frankly - can be a difficult thing to do - the notion of a surefire pattern or formula can seem oh so tempting. Here's the thing though: most of those patterns have worked for one or two individuals. When they say 'it did it for me' they're not kidding. But they're not you.

I'll wager few of us have deliberately tried to live a life like Ted Hughes, or Jack London, or J K Rowling, but somehow all the elements of their lives - skills, experiences and opportunities - coalesced together wonderfully and the results are literary legend. 

And yet...

There are courses aplenty that not only show you techniques to free up your own creativity, they also give you the formula. Ah, that tingly formula - making us wonder why we ever tried to take the long way around. Forget "Adder's fork, and blind-worm's sting, lizard's leg and howlet's wing," the formula for writing is, ironically, a lot less formulaic.

- You need a proper education, or an intuitive grasp of language.
- You need to apply the standard rules of grammar, or to apply your own (James Joyce and Eimear McBride).
- You need to have contacts, or you need to be lucky.
- You need a social media presence, or no one ever sold novels through social media.
- You need a strategy, or you need to learn as you go.
- You need an agent / publisher, or you need to go it alone.

Chamomile tea is available at the end of this post.

I'm not saying that there aren't many useful things to be learned from courses. For examples, a novel writing summer school I attended at University College Falmouth (and if you want to know why it's written in that order, look at the initials - I was genuinely told that) radically changed how I write and gave me new insights about plotting, POV and characterisation.

What I am saying is that you need to find the formula for you. The fact that there are no guarantees and no absolutes is not a tragedy. Sure, it can feel that way when you think you've tried everything and nothing has worked. But that just isn't so. No formula, no fate and no destiny is not a tragedy, it's a liberation.

(And yes, you might say that thinking that way is fated anyway, but how would we ever know that one way or the other. Unless we're fated to, I mean.)

Science relies on formulae, which, by definition, produce the same results when the same elements - in the same combination - are combined in an identical set of circumstances. And that's the point. No two people, no two book and no two sets of circumstances are identical.

Writing, like life, involves risks, chances, connections, timing, opportunities, inspiration, influences, money, talent, perseverance and not a little luck. Who knows? Maybe that's the way it's supposed to be.

Whatever your system (cosmic ordering, how to write a perfect novel pts 1 to 24, the 'you can sell a ton of books like I did' course, or my parents own a publishing house and distribution network, etc.) please don't let any of it distract you from the only system that does work.
- Select from any of 26 letters.
- Add appropriate punctuation (and only you know what's appropriate for you).
- Write with passion, style, talent and authenticity, or none of those things.
- Get to The End.
- Edit.
- Now you have yourself a book.
- Figure out what to do next.

And why Cu₂CO₃(OH)₂ in the title? Well, if you haven't looked it up yet - and I seriously doubt that - it's the chemical formula for Malachite. When I was first introduced to geology as a child, and later, when I used to make jewellery from semi-precious stones, I thought Malachite was one of the most beautiful things I'd ever seen. Still do, actually.

The picture above holds its own story. Anything super green tends to catch my eye - broccoli, the Faery tradition, emeralds, algae covered rocks - all those and more. So when we were walking on the beach and I saw them, how could I resist? No matter that the rocks were unstable and only an idiot doesn't have two hands out to steady themselves, right? That picture is the last one the camera ever took. Shortly afterwards it - and my elbow - had a close encounter with a couple of boulders. Memory cards are surprisingly robust these days, don't you think? It must be something to do with the manufacturer's formula...

Seven Useful Tools

Sometimes it seems as though the writing life is just so damned complicated. You can't help wondering how the likes of Hemingway or Jack London managed with just a writing pad, a typewriter, and a bottle of liquor for company. But manage they did; they and countless others who did not have the blessings - and the tribulations - of technology to get them to The End.

Are you overwhelmed by choices and possibility?

Do you ever feel that sometimes this writer's life is missing something? I think I can help. I know just what's missing.

It's you.

Unless your writing has your undivided attention, mentally and emotionally, you're doing it - and your readers - a dis-service.

Fret ye not. Here are seven everyday tools to help you free up the writer within.

1. An Alarm clock. (What? You were expecting a high value development system?) This state-of-the-art time measuring tool will enable you to get up earlier, keep track of your time - in real time, and give you a reminder when your writing time starts and ends.

2. Spreadsheets. Yes, I know, it doesn't sound very creative but bear with me. Spreadsheets can help you track your submissions (so you're not waiting a year like I did...), keep running totals of chapter and story word counts, and - when the money starts rolling in - use formulae to work out profit, loss, tax and expenses. All you have to do is set the spreadsheet up properly (see Youtube!) and remember to input the data.

3. The trusty notepad and pen. Sure, it seems obvious. But how many times have you had a brilliant idea and by the time you commit it to paper your precious treasure has become a tarnished knick-knack? That notepad should go everywhere with you except in the shower. You can use a permanent marker for that and clean it off somehow later.

4. An answering machine. If you're writing, bar a genuine crisis (that's bigger than your protagonist's crisis), you are not available. You can leave a message to that effect if it makes you feel any better. Think of it as a time stealer training device. The more seriously you take your writing, the more seriously other people will too.

5. The remote control. I like Judge Judy as much as the next writer, and some fly-on-the-wall documentaries are truly compelling, but what about the dramas in your own head waiting for an audience? Turn off, or turn off and record, and prioritise your activities in line with your intentions.

6. A writing system that cannot go online. This could be an A4 writing pad; or an old laptop; or an old laptop, a router and some self control. You can make a note of anything you need to research and tackle it later to avoid interrupting the flow.

7. An open window. This will provide you with fresh air, cunning designed by Nature to help keep you awake. It will also provide background noise, and occasionally speech, to ground you in reality (now and again) and help to inspire you.

Just to show I take my own advice, I am switching off the TV for July. I will record anything I feel is worth waiting a month for, and any actual downtime can be used to watch the 30 hours of recorded material (mostly films) that I've never found time for in the last two years. I'll let you know how I get on!

What Rejection Can Teach Us

"I'm afraid it's going to have to be a 'no' from me."

David French and I once wrote that rejection was just life's way of telling you you're unworthy. Despite that note of hilarity, it may seem as though there's nothing to be gained from a rejection other than an increased desire for chocolate. However, some rejections can be very useful indeed, once you know how to interpret them.

By way of illustration, here are three recent nil points from my own table along with some thoughts.

1. Sample material from one of my novels to a literary agent.

"While we enjoyed reading your submission, which stood out from the many we receive, we couldn't find an agent here who felt strongly enough to take it further and therefore we are afraid we are not able to offer you representation for this project."

I'll start by saying that I always take rejections on trust. It saves time. I don't assume they're just being kind, or that they'd love to discuss it with me further at great length and preferably in person over coffee. It just is what it is - all they need me to know is in the words.

The highlights, as I see it

-    They enjoyed reading it.

-    It stood out from the many.

-    They couldn't find an agent who felt strongly enough about it.

For me, the key question then is why didn't an agent feel strongly enough about it?

The following thoughts arose

-    Did I target the right agent and / or the right agency?

-    Does my book have enough commercial potential?

-    What changes could I make  - and would I be willing to make - before the next submission?

An afterthought

These days there is little value in writing back to agents. They're snowed under and, realistically, they'll probably refer you to The Writers' & Artists' Handbook, or The Writers' Handbook, or even one of their own courses.

Okay, next please. 

2. This time it was a short story submission to a prestigious magazine.

"This piece was poetic and provocative, for some reason it reminded me of Keats with its longing. I really think it would work better as a poem than a story, because the event described is so isolated and framed in beauty. We’re taking a pass on this in its current fiction form, but please do feel free to rework it/resend it or dazzle us with your other stories when we re-open."

The highlights, as I see it

-    They clearly read it carefully and understood the effect I was going for.

-    I achieved that effect to some extent.

-    They're clear about what they'd like to see in order to consider it afresh.

-    I know that such poetry is not within my repertoire.

The following thought arose

- Maybe a new piece in a different genre might interest them. 

An afterthought

I sent one in and I hope to hear back in a couple of months.

3. This final rejection is from the People Per Hour freelancing site.

"Offered to another bidder, price was not the factor. Thank you for your time."

The highlights, as I see it

-    My pricing for the job was appropriate.

The following thoughts arose

-    Was my pitch right for the client?

-    Was the client right for me?

In the end, the worst rejections - and indeed the only really useless ones - are those that tell us nothing new beyond 'no thanks'. In the end, it's a piece of information we can sometimes learn from and develop as a consequence.

Now, where's that chocolate? 

Picture This

Every time I get a new notebook, at some point as I gradually fill the pages, I draw an updated version of the same diagram. It's usually titled 'My Writing Universe' or something equally modest. Basically, it consists of an overview of everything I'm writing, have written, or really ought to be getting on with. 

It covers genres and categories of writing (novels, short fiction, articles and features, comedy material, etc.) and the relationships between them. Think: lots of rough circles, lists and dotted lines. It helps me keep track and shows me where there are gaps and patterns. It's also a confessional for all those pieces I've yet to complete (or start, in some cases), sometimes added to the canon in pencil. 2B or not 2B, as they say.

I can't say whether that picture is worth 50 score words, but an image or graphical representation can allow us to see things differently.

While working on Scars & Stripes, my latest completed novel, I needed to see the shape of the book and whether the comedy, drama and, well, tragedy had the right balance. I especially wanted to get a feel for the rhythm of the highs and lows, from chapter to chapter. One graphing session later and hey presto it's clear that my idea of comedy tends to be more 'oh dear' than 'ha ha'.

Another great visual tool, which I've used in the past, is Wordle. What better way to highlight those overused words that crop up like unexpected relatives? When I produced a Wordle for Scars & Stripes I was surprised at the result - see for yourself below.

As they say, seeing is believing.

One, two, free.

Of all the words guaranteed to fire a writer up, few inspire as much passion, controversy and vitriol as the word free*. Many writers, starting out, are happy (or, at least, prepared) to allow their work to appear for gratis. There are some valid reasons for wanting to do it: gaining a publication byline, gaining a link / pdf for your portfolio, or gaining feedback, to name but three.

Critics argue that everyone deserves to be paid for their time and their labour, often bringing out the time-honoured plumber analogy.

I've been vocal in the past about the perils of writing for nothing, unscrupulous editors who exploit desperate writers and competitions where the rules insist that all entrants give up first rights to their submission, even if they don't make it to the final.

By way of balance, I should point out that I've written material for royalties that only existed in principle and never materialised in my bank account. I've also willingly written and edited for free because I wanted to help out or the cause / publication / website interested me.

The thing is, much as it pains me to say it, I've started to realise how much all writers rely on free stuff.

I use online news gathering services and websites to source topical material for gags and sketches. Similarly, Youtube and websites for lyrics enable me to create parody songs for performance. The web is also a brilliant research tool when I'm checking facts for articles and features (not just Wiki, honest!).

When I'm not listening to old radio progs on BBC iPlayer, I tend to go for either Beatles Radio or one of the Live365 stations.

Need some writing advice? There's a ton of it out there. I regularly read tips, links and content from Sophie Lizard, Jon Morrow, Gary Smailes, Mark Silver and others.

Looking for free information about paid writing gigs? Craigslist has been good to me.

Fancy a little distraction? How about a few games of pool on Miniclip?

And let's not forget a few of the essentials for jobbing writers - Skype, Dropbox, Webmail, Blogs and all those free apps.

Of course, as you'll have surmised, some services and information are given freely as an incentive to sign up for a more comprehensive version. I think that's fair enough. It's the closest you'll get to a free lunch.

So, free or not free - what's the verdict?

Everything may be black and white on the page, but trust me, off the page, it's a lot more colourful.

* Okay, maybe plagiarism - I'll give you that.

Who? What? Where? Wye!

This writing business will be the death of us.

Even out of season, Hay-on-Wye is the Shangri-La of book lovers and writers. Here, it is unusual to see someone who isn't reading, or carrying books around (possibly for effect - Jack Kerouac man, you know who you are). There are also numerous others, scribbling feverishly into their notepads (the paper kind), lifting their heads momentarily to snatch at inspiration as it does a runner down Lion Street. Judging by the clientele seen in the cafes, if the town isn't sponsored by The Guardian it's missing a trick.

There is competition among the bookshops, certainly, but there is also a sense of community. Collectively, they are greater than he sum of their shelves. Everyone knows why they're here - books - and that somehow gives the place a sense of tranquility. It's probably helped by some shops flying the anti-technology banner and proudly proclaiming, 'Kindles are banned here.'

To be honest, being confronted by so many books and bookshops is overwhelming. There's a part of me that wondered what the point is of writing books, when this deluge of literature already exists. And yet, there's also a poetry and magic about seeing books I have known and loved, at different points in my life, still up on the shelves for others to enjoy. Those treasured titles are time capsules for me, drawing me back not only to the book itself, but to all the personal circumstances surrounding it as well - who recommended or gave it to me, what was going on in my life at the time, and what my emotional experience of the book was (and is now). My elegant commentary aside, there are a lot of crap books there too.

Facing the sheer volume of new and used books, as we wandered from shop to shop, is also strangely liberating. If any of my books make it to print  - and I do mean print - I hope they will one day find their way to a dusty shelf where an inquisitive reader might discover them. And if I happen to be giving a talk at Hay-on-Wye, about the launch of my eighth consecutive bestseller, so much the better. (Second would be fine, at this point, along with the bargain bucket.)

Hay-on-Wye reminds writers that there really is room for everyone is the book is well-written and has the courage of the author's convictions. Not everyone will get your book, and that's the way it's supposed to be.

I particularly loved Richard Booth's Bookshop, with its tiled exterior, its interior head-butting cat, the lovely wide staircase and the library-like high ceilings. My favourite bookshop, however, was Murder and Mayhem. For me, it epitomises what I love about good writing - whatever the genre: distinctive, true to its genre and unapologetically enthusiastic about it as well.

Guest spot - Seshu Kiran GS - The Art of the Matter

Arizona by Seshu Kiran GS, used with permission of the artist.  

What is creativity?  

Is it taking an abstract idea and crystallising it into something tangible?

And should the process of creativity also have an impact on the practitioner as 

well as the reader / viewer / listener / purchaser? 

On the face of it, writers deal in words and are distinct from artists. 

And yet... 

Many of those stages and challenges are the same. 

Here, in his own words, Seshu Kiran GS - an artist living in Los Angeles - gives an insight into his process, his beautiful paintings, and how he expresses himself on the canvas. 

1. What was it that originally drew you to painting? 

That is a bit of tough question! But yes, as a child, I was imaginative and used to draw a lot. Watercolors and color pencils happened to me when I was in fourth grade. I used to love my exploring my imagination and I was captivated by the visual elements around me. 

2. Do your works have an emotional element or story to them, whether it's apparent in the work for something personal for you in their creation? 

In terms of emotional element and story, both are important. As I always say, I derive my inspiration not just from visual reality around me, but also travels, stories, movies, etc. Most of the landscape paintings that I do these days are of an emotional element, expressed through color, texture and form! It's a struggle before a painting is born!

Having a personal experience is not always the necessary start point for a painting, but yes it is an added advantage. Most of my paintings are from my imagination without a photographic reference.

I have always seen a pattern of colors that I choose from based on emotions!! There is some connection there!!

3. Are you artistically inspired by literature? 

Maybe there is an overlap of influence and philosophy. Literature is also an imaginative art,

where the writer undergoes a deep visual process and arranges what they see and experience into words, like a jewelry of precious stones!

Words, sentences and chapters, each beautiful at their own discreet level; from expression in sub-elements, to expression in the gross level. In a similar process, the same thing happens in painting, from sub-elements to the entirety!

It sounds an atypical combination. I don't know if I actually derive inspiration from their works, but I enjoy the writing of Emerson and Thoreau, and both Hemingway and Rand for the process. 

Each distinctly stood not just on a fictitious cajolery of words, but gifted us their own philosophies and chiseled a character of freedom in this land and elsewhere. Conformists like Paul Krugman downplay the importance of their philosophy, but it is still relevant in these days!

I have yet to encounter that post-modern figure that I could find a spark from. Because these days, post-modern and progressive types thrive by shutting down your rational apparatus and subtly demanding and chaining peer conformity! 

4. How do you define your work?

I am a sauntering child amused at various things. I welcome you to share my joy, and my world, with a big smile!!

5. When you exhibit, do you offer a descriptive explanation of what the work is 

about?

In my personal experience, when most viewers stop at my painting, they look into it. And they stare for quite some time and they smile! Actually they engage with that image. That is the best reward I could ask for and I always appreciate it.

The next thing they do is look at me, and then I start to explain the background of that painting. Sometimes I even miss out the title of the painting and it sells untitled! Most of my buyers say that my paintings have a distinct and strong presence.

When you are in a beautiful place, the experience and the conversation happening inside you is your own! It is invaluable. Similarly when a viewer is 'inside' my painting, I don't want to overpower their imagination and experience with mine. 

6. Do you start with form or flow? 

That's a brilliant question! Actually a tough one again! Sometimes, I don't have time even to title my work! I feel it's a nice thing to happen. For me, grabbing that flow of emotion and quickly putting it on canvas is important.

Form and flow are intertwined. Form without flow is mundane. And flow without form is directionless. May be are they like Yin-Yang? Or the triangles in star of David?!! The counter-nature is always trying to throw you out of balance. It's our challenge, as artists, to stay in balance to counter it!

7. How has your creative process evolved and in which ways has it changed 

over time? 

Yes. I am constantly learning and implementing. I have a lot of learning to do on a daily basis, which keeps me busy. One day, I pick composition and the next day I may be drawn to human anatomy. Colors always surprise me and delight me in different ways. 

Also, I can say, I was always drawn to realism. It is not just about representing forms, but a mood, unity and meaning that I can create. The process of realism respects facts. And takes artistic liberties around that fulcrum. I can't paint clouds in green unless it means something even in its abstract sense. 

With respect to technique and implementation, I keep learning from other artists, both living and deceased. I like the aptness and joy in Norman Rockwell's paintings. I like the Italian master, Dario Campanile, who painted that Paramount Pictures' mountain! I've had the privilege to have met him and I talked to him at his show in Newport Beach.

Some of Seshu Kiran's work can be seen on his Facebook page 

https://www.facebook.com/artkiran/ 

He is currently exhibiting his artwork in and around Los Angeles.

Story time

An early form of tablet, which wasn't very portable.

As the old joke* goes, "What's the difference between a short story and a novel?" Answer: The word count. Ask any creator of short fiction and they will tell you how much focus and effort and, well, creativity it takes to produce a work of short fiction that still manages to tick most the essentials off this list:

- Engage the reader and draw them into the story.
- Eliminate waste and distraction.
- Remove the author from the equation.
- Give the reader a satisfying ending that will still leave them wanting more.

In my novel, Scars & Stripes, Alex is walking down a street in the St Mark's district of Manhattan when he sees a sign on a window: What's Your Story? Led by curiosity, Alex winds up in an apartment where a bespectacled dude is hunched over a typewriter (it was the 1980s), working on a collection of other people's stories. For the sci-fi aficionados among you, this could almost be Alex's future or parallel self. It could, if it was that sort of novel.

Arguably, that scene is a metaphor for one of the novel's central premises - Alex is one of life's observers, but he also remembers small things that other people forget. The novel, and therefore Alex's story, is actually filled with the stories of other people he encounters. In the scene I mention above, Alex sells some of his real life stories (albeit fictionalised by bias and ego) to the writer who then creates something new out of them for a magazine. Ironically, Alex encounters one of those magazines, further down the line, and barely recognises his own history in there.

We're all enthralled and enchanted by stories from an early age. The structure of fairy tales and traditional bedtime stories has been pawed over by mythologists and experts to reveal common threads and forms. I've also mentioned, elsewhere on this blog, how researchers like Joseph Campbell identified commonalities found in the mythologies of different and unconnected cultures.

Like many other writers, I do read online reviews of other people's work and I'm struck how often the critics denounce the typos and grammar, or the two-dimsnional characterisation, and how rarely they turn their attention to the actual story itself. It seems to me that if the story engages the reader and captivates them, even if the writing was deemed below par, the author as on to something. 

I'd argue that stories are a rich and vital part of our psyche, individually and collectively. Stories makes us feel, consider, react and yearn. Whether it's in a theatre, at a cinema, watching the soaps or Jeremy Kyle, or even reading a book (remember those?), stories bring us to life.

If you'd like to read some of my own short stories, here are some handy links:

The Silent Hills - a 5000 word tale of suspense and revelation.
Coffee Shop Chronicles - an anthology containing my story, Diner. 
Beyond the Horizon - an anthology containing my sci-fi story, Rogue.
Kissing Frankenstein - an anthology containing several of my really short stories.  

Saturday Night - a little slice of Americana for free (partly inspired by Raymond Carver).



*It wasn't an old joke - I made it up. Feel free to quote me on it.

Seven Painful Truths About Social Media

Best foot forward.

A Public Service Announcement

If you write books, you need to reach an audience. Preferably, one with a voracious reading habit and plenty of spare cash. After you've exhausted your relatives and friends (literally, in some cases), the internet seems to glimmer like a golden gateway to prosperity, success and authorial fulfilment. Hold that thought. Why don't you sit down? There are some things you need to know.

1. People will follow you on Twitter, so, naturally, you follow them back. And then...in the dead of the night...they unfollow you. It's like the kid at school who got you to share your sweets and then the next day they scoffed all of theirs without telling you. Sneaky.

However, there are online tools you can use, such as Tweepi, to decouple yourself from those finaglers (love that word!). Also, don't follow someone back without first checking what they're about. If you're trying to promote your writing, hot dates in your local area or I can get you 5000 followers for $15 probably doesn't reflect well on your creativity.

2. Many people may follow your blog (hurrah), and post comments (hurrah deux), just to lay a trail of breadcrumbs back to their own blog. This needn't be a bad thing if their blog interests you and / or you can add insightful or interesting comments on their blogs in return. However, that doesn't mean you have to accept every comment. Naturally, you've tweaked your settings to ensure you approve each comment before it's posted?

3. Facebook likes mean nothing. Okay, you might get a brief and warm tingly feeling, but if you're plugging a book - preferably on its own Facebook page, by the way - what you really want people to do is share your post and preface it with a comment of their own. 

You could use a tool like Networked blogs, although, in the interests of balance, not everyone agrees.

4. You can't be everywhere at once, all the time. Or, indeed, at any time. Experiment with social media, see what works and what's fun (which may not be the same thing), and keep in mind why you're using social media in the first place.

5. Once you have a prominent and active social media profile - one which hopefully brings your books to a wider and appreciative audience - your relationship with your audience will change. 

Ideally, any questions you're asked about your work will form the basis of further posts, allowing you to engage with your readers and supporters in, if not real time, then something fairly close to it. Just as, by definition, you can't have a dozen BFFs, you should not expect - or lead others to expect - an intimate connection with too many of your readers.

6. There are so many social media platforms and tools that it's scary. If you think I'm exaggerating, here's a handy list. A little discernment goes a long way.

7. Social media can cloud your judgement and waste your time. You can easily spend valuable writing time chasing popularity, joining other platforms because A N Other invited you and you don't want to disappoint them, and repeating everything you've already said on another platform just because the new platform is hip. (People still say 'hip', right?) 

If you're a writer, your first loyalty is to your work, so keep that in mind when you choose to do anything else on your computer. Your time and focus are finite. Meantime, social media is a 24 days a day, 365 and a quarter days a year phenomenon. It's a carousel and only you can decide when it's right for you to get on and when you need to take a break from it all.


In conclusion, using social media can be a smexi move if you want to tap into a global market. It can also be a frustrating and disappointing experience if you dont ask yourself some important questions before you start:
a) Which platforms might be right for me?
b) How much time do I have - or want - to spend on social media.
c) Am I clear about what I want to say?
d) Who is my target audience? 

I've been Derek Thompson, freelance writer and author, and you've been a lovely audience. 

Now, about my books...